Archive | May 2015

Super Dad

When I was a little girl, my dad changed my diapers, fed me (even in the middle of the night), got me ready for school, made sure I took my Flinstone vitamins, helped me with my homework and class projects and once, he even made a mini-me doll from scratch for me. She looked exactly like me. Kind of.

Fast forward to today. My husband is eagerly stepping into his role as a ‘daddy.’ And what I’m realizing in the process is that one should never underestimate the role a father plays.

Perhaps, a long time ago, people perceived dads to be the person who brings home the ‘bacon’ and moms to be the one to raise the children. But with education and social progression, these outdated stereotypes have gone out the window.

The distinctions between mom and dad are slowly fading. And it’s beautiful. No longer is it Mommy versus Daddy. Mommy and Daddy are becoming synonymous.

I’m glad to see so many fathers doing just as much as moms nowadays if not more for their children. In certain cultures or places, people may scoff at the men who do dishes, cook, and change diapers. But I think it takes a real man to step up to do whatever it takes to provide for his family – even if it means doing nighttime feeds for baby on a work night.

Super Dads have always existed. But we’re noticing them more now. I see them at the library during Baby Storytime. I see them at Toddler Gym Classes. I see them at parks teaching their kids how to ride a bike. Some are stay-at-home dads and some are working dads. I get so happy when I see them because they remind me of my dad who was juggling being a new dentist while taking care of me in my baby-days/nights. They remind me of my husband who cherishes every chance he gets to spend with our daughter, to the point that he comes home for lunch during his work days just to squeeze in those extra minutes with family.

Dads, you are amazing. And you make a difference.

There’s a saying – “Be the type of man you would want your daughter to be with.” Because of the example my dad set for me, I was able to land a man I am thankful to call my husband and the father of our child.

Dads, you are role models to your children.

When my dad helped my mom at home, I saw them tackling everything from cooking to yard work together as a team… he was showing me gender equality. He was teaching me what respect looks like. He was teaching me about love.

We had a family friend over recently. She’s an older generation mom and she saw my husband washing the dishes while I was taking care of our 1-year old. She told me she had a lot of resentment because her husband didn’t help much with the home or her daughter. It makes me sad to think some dads might miss out on one of the most out-of-this-world experiences one can have.

Dads, you can set the bar high.

Maybe your dad couldn’t be as involved with raising you but don’t let that stop you from being the Super Dad that you are.

I didn’t fully understand the role my father played in raising me until I became a parent myself. It makes me so thankful and appreciative of all dads everywhere…moms do a lot, but let’s never discount our dads! Every dad has a Super Dad inside of him…and amazing things happen when he lets that side out 🙂

My Super Dad

My Super Dad

My Daughter's Super Dad

My Daughter’s Super Dad

 

Flying *Without* Baby

I had not realized how much my life has changed post-baby until recently.

My daughter Amaani is about to turn 1-year old. It was only after doing 14 flights with Amaani and then flying once by myself that it hit me.

I took a day trip for work. I anticipated it being exhausting because I knew I would have to wake up super early in the morning and that I would be coming home late. But it was cake, given what my normal days are like.

The first thing that amazed me was how fast I could get through the airport. I had already checked in online and had a mobile boarding pass. I cruised through security and made it to my gate within 5 minutes.

I had totally forgotten what it’s like to travel without carrying diaper bags and suitcases that had mostly baby stuff and maybe a little bit of my own. I had forgotten what it’s like not to have to dismantle Amaani’s carseat and stroller while carrying her through security. I had forgotten what it’s like not having to worry about changing diapers and feeding baby before and after takeoff. I had forgotten what it’s like not to spend the entire plane ride trying to keep my active daughter in my lap and hopefully not kissing the passenger seats and windows or grabbing people’s food off the tray tables (or in one case, a man’s headphones)

To be completely honest – I felt like I was playing hooky on this day. Hooky from being a mom. I knew my daughter was in great hands so I was carefree, in that sense, about going away for the day.

When I reached my destination, again, I was surprised. I actually had time to do my hair and makeup and I could take my time choosing which dress to put on. Usually, everything I do is interrupted. I tend to getting Amaani ready first and then rush getting ready myself. On this day, I got to take my time. And I did. I even spent time matching my jewelry.

I didn’t have any spit up on me. I didn’t have to clean up any food spills. I didn’t have to worry about my daughter. All of this felt really strange.

It begged the question – did I love my present life or did I miss my old life?

It was a very interesting question. Getting around is definitely faster and easier without a baby. You don’t have to worry about putting her in a carseat or carrying toys that will entertain her.

But when I was on the plane, do you know what I was doing? I was looking at my daughter’s pictures and videos, hearing the sound of her laughter and recordings of her saying “mama.” I was missing my travel buddy who may be a handful but she makes the plane rides go by fast. And she helps me forget about turbulence.

I realized there used to be days when she was a newborn that I would miss my former care-free life where I could do things I wanted, whenever I wanted. But now, a year later, I am so entrenched in my journey as a mom that I have not only forgotten how different life was before (for the most part) but I am also in love with my life now.

I may not get around or travel as fast as I once could… but I am no longer traveling alone. I carry a beautiful part of me and my husband’s love everywhere I go (and I wouldn’t want it any other way!)

Travel Buddy